Bloodsport
- lindsaybjerregaard
- Oct 26, 2021
- 2 min read
IMDB Synopsis
"Bloodsport" follows Frank Dux, an American martial artist serving in the military, who decides to leave the army to compete in a martial arts tournament in Hong Kong where fights to the death can occur.
IMDB Rating: 6.8/10
Our Rating: 9.6/10
Our Reviews:
This is like the slightly less ridiculous version of Kickboxer in which Jean-Claude Van Damme plays an American with a Belgian accent who travels to Asia to compete in a martial arts tournament and ends up having to avenge an injured loved one. If you’re a fan of JCVD in low-cut tank tops doing splits, this is the flick for you because it happens frequently. If that same category is one that revs your engine, you’ll particularly appreciate the obligatory training montage, which Bryan described as “Japanese daddy destroys young Belgian bodybuilder.” The side plot with his romantic interest is also a master class in unethical journalism practices, and I give bonus points for the way the movie skipped an awkward 80’s sex scene and opted instead for a jarring shot of JCVD pulling a tiny speedo over his naked, glorious badonk the next morning.
What more do you want out of a film? White guy of indeterminate national origin enters a winner-take-all fighting tournament in Hong Kong that featured as many varied fighting styles as UFC #1 but with way better personalities, including Ogre from Revenge of the Nerds: Nerds in Paradise. Chong Li is a nightmare of a Big Bad with his unabashed amorality and vibrating pectorals stuffed into skin smooth enough to be in a Clearasil ad. Oh, and what's that? You're worried there won't be a scene where Van Damme unashamedly shows off that he's flexible enough to give birth without an epidural? Got you, fam.
Holds up, year after year, decade after decade. RIP monkey-style guy.
If you want a movie with doing the splits, a shitty investigative reporter, and slow motion jowl shaking, this is your jam.
In this late 80's Oscar-bait film, JCVD enters a lethal martial arts tournament and does the splits and crotch punches some dude. The Citizen Kane of its time.
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