Rhinestone

IMDB Synopsis

A country music star must turn an obnoxious New York cabbie into a singer in order to win a bet.

IMDB Rating: 3.9/10

Our Rating: 8.2/10

Our Reviews:

Disclaimer: I fucking loved this movie. The basic premise is that Dolly Parton is a struggling country singer in New York City (could the struggle maybe be because she chose to attempt a country music career in NYC of all places?) who makes a bet with her sleazy boss that she can turn Sylvester Stallone’s uncouth NYC taxi driver character into a country singer. While I could do without the cringey romance between Sly and Dolly, this movie has the most amazingly bad/good costumes, fantastically manic scenes of Sly trying to perform country music, casual sexual harassment out the ass, and a finale that involves Sly, with limbs flailing akimbo, commandeering a horse on the streets of NYC.

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Rhinestone was way more entertaining than it had any business being. All I have to say is that Dolly Parton must have real lower back problems. Not because she's famously both naturally and doctorally endowed in the breastal area, but because she picked this movie up on her shoulders and carried it up the highest mountain in the Great Smokies.

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Not sure if Dolly Parton's back hurts more from her boobs or carrying this movie. 80 year-old Sly should only where his outfits from this movie.

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Good, but I'd just watch Dolly singing for 1.5 hours instead.

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He is foolish, the beer is fine

He's just ghoulish, he's Drinkenstein

Now he will say it if he thinks it

And it will change him if he drinks it

I'm Drinkenstein, you're Drinkenstein

She's Drinkenstein, we're all Drinkenstein

Drinkenstein, Drinkenstein, we're Drinkenstein

Oooooh, yeah!